The wrong answer game

The look in a child's eyes when his dog has just been run over by a cement truck--or Arizona State.

Why didn't Lassie ever lick himself?

Because his sister cat kept him clean.

What were Tweetie Bird's last words?

"Hewwo, Poiton Contwoh? Tat putty tat put tumtin in my birdteed!"

Why don't elephants ever forget?

Inquiring amnesiastic elephants wanted to know. So they went as a group to the leader of the elephant pack who was very old. Why, they asked, do elephants never forget? The elder thought long and hard. Much time passed before he replied: "I forget."

How did time run backwards?

Very carefully.

What is the middle name of the Statue of Liberty?

"Liberty". This is the wrong answer game after all.

What never stops spinning?

A wooden block.

Where is Elvis?

Happily multiplying in vegas.

What's a conuption?

What the harelipped lawyer said when asked what he was charging the politician with.

Why are there two sides to every story?

lol, I think the better question would be why are there 2 million sides to every story?

What is the best use for popcorn?

That is actually really hard to think of an unture answer for that question!
Have to resort to the ridiculous....
Flotation devices for those little purple people who live in my kitchen cupboard (and eat all my secrete stash of chocolate biscuts!)

Oh, question....
when does time end?

Well the bell rings or when the parole board lets you out.


Why does gas cost so much?

It isn't the gas that costs more; sign companies starting charging more for those removable plastic letters.

What's the difference between ketchup and catsup?

Ketchup is when you finally catch up to someone who was getting a lead on you, while catsup is supper for the cat.

What is a lust gallery?

Lust Gallery was a potential weekly television series pitched by Rod Serling. Unfortunately, he wasn't able to sell it to one of the broadcast networks due to excessive sexual content - and cable outlets weren't available at the time he pitched this show!

What was Robby the Robot's greatest talent in the 1956 film, Forbidden Planet?

Dancing the night away.
(I can't tell you the number of times I've seen that movie.)

Why is twightlight so colorful?

Because berries and fish are nature's unisom.

Why does the rain come from the gray clouds?

Because Gray is a color for funerals or death, the rain is actuallybtears for the world.

Why doesn't the sun fall from the sky?

Crazy glue holds it firmly in place on its track.

What is the funniest color? And why?

Red because it is the color of Ronald McDonalds hair.

How do birds stand on power lines without dying?

Birds have insulated soles on their feet.

How do bugs walk on the ceiling without falling off?

It really isn't happening. It is the weed you smoke.

Hmmmm, why do dogs chase their tails?

Because one good turn deserves another.

If a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound?

yes because the squirrels scream as their home hits the ground.

Was the world black & white in the 50's?

Apparently it was.

What goes whoosh, whoosh?

Robby the Robot when he goes snow skiiing while on vacation at Lake Tahoe.

What is the best pet food if you have a Beverly Hills Chihuahua as a pet?