The wrong answer game

Mathematics! That should be painfully obvious.....


Why do some creatures howl at the moon?

'cause mathematics hurts their heads, but they are hopelessly in love...

Why do zombies only eat brains?

Because "hearts" are much too tender......and zombies like to "chew" on things for a while......

What is a zombie raid?

A zombie raid is a party occasion when a group of people, usually university students, descend en masse on a drinking establishment to drink zombies, a very delicious drink...and by the time they leave said drinking establishment, they collectively resemble a "parliament of zombies".

Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?

Because on the day that you were born, the angels got together and decided to create a dream...........a scheme........a plot to make your life more than it ever seemed possible.......and on the seam their is a few threads lingering that needed a plucker duck to pull them out........

If plucker duck plucks ducks.......how many ducks can plucker duck pluck?

Well....I spose if someone who knew how to plucking pluck...would give a pluck...they could teach us a plucking lesson on this 'said' plucker duck! pfffff!

On that note...Vi a duck? Vi not a chicken?
[Old Marx brothers question...that went round and round wrongly...]

Vi a turkey last I saw....

Why isn't a turkey the U.S. national bird?

because the pilgrim fathers didn't want to feel guilty for eating the national bird, and the turkey tasted better, so the eagle got to be then uneaten national bird.

Why don't we have national bugs, or national snakes?

because inter......got added to national.......and the bugs and snakes didnt like that part.....

If you were bugged what would be the worse thing I would hear...

"Do we have the Hemlock to add to the pot luck dish?"


What would you prefer to never understand?

Why bears like trampling on pixies...

If bears could fly like pixies.....would they fly together or not?

yes, because they can`t `bear` to be alone...


why do centipedes have 100 legs ?

because age old wisdom says a hundred legs are better on a centipede than a human because then he would run so fast........I wouldnt be able to keep up....

One hundred not out............is that possible?

Yes, in a very big closet!

How do we know when we've found the edge of the universe?

by the sign...

what meal should you order in the restaurant at the end of the universe?

Something incredibly healthy to carry you past the ending.

How can sleep be so pleasurable and so illusive at the same time?

its a bit like killing two birds with the one stone......only you dont kill sleep and illusions you love them both.......and all is well that ends well....in sleep mode that is.......oh hang on you said illusive....I read that wrong....oh well its the wrong answer game.........wrong reads are ok then

tea for two and two for tea............anyone?

Only if they are teed off? Then there is plenty of tea to go around.

How is gravity defied?

By angrily shaking your fist at it and saying I defy you gravity!!

What is the best way to find a wormhole?

Dangle a little fish from a lone and see if a worm bites. If you catch one, be sure to also catch the hole before it disappears.

What is the best way to get the most people to laugh at once?

nitrous oxide...

what colour is air?

whatever colour you wish to breathe in.............if you tell me your colour I will tell you what your breathing in...

I want to breathe rainbows!

why does love hurt?

Some times love hits a shield thats made of iron........and it knocks the person holding the shield for a six..............and six for some means the highest score one can get........I guessing scoring in this way can be extremely painful..you acheive things you set out to do........but when it hurts so deeply is it worth it?

Once a six is scored.........where does one go from there? Oh two questions I have asked....oh well two to choose from today.....choose away...

Once a 6 is scored, one has two options. Try for triple 6, or 666; or go back to 0 and begin again.

What is a star made of?

A star is made of tiny cubes of silver jelly all joined together.........If you hold on to a siver jelly star too tight, it wobbles and can fall out of the sky......when this happens you wouldnt want to be in its vicinity cos you will get star jelly blobbed.........hmmmm lol!!

If you got sliver star jelly blobbed how would you clean up yourself?

awww...I thought my answer was wonderful for the last one:

flesh and bone, like the rest of us, but maybe something extra in the confidence and emotive ability departments...


and I would just lick off silver star jelly myself, same as any other kind of jelly...


why do we call the eyes the windows to the soul?

Well, in ancient times, it was felt that eyes were actual windows and if they didn't stay closed, the soul could sneek out and the person would then become a souless monster. Hmmm.....considering megacorps, they may have a point...

Why do hydrogenated fat and corn syrup taste so good?

they do?

I dont do time well......how do you do time?

I have it down pat! (this is the wrong answer game remember, lol)

What does pitter pattering mean?